found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
me + whiskey = a bad person
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
