who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
