Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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