Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
40s are totally the cure
Someone signed my nipple.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize