He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
