So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
