I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
