So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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