his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Randomize
