I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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