hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize