that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
