I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
