ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
