I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize