I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
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