oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
