the condom got lost in my hair
People in love make me want to vomit
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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