It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
