So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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