Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
How external is "for external use only"?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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