whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
