My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
