Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
