I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Randomize