when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Randomize
