When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Randomize