thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
