yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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