why didn't you poke me back
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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