Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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