I wannas sexs uuuuu
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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