I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
No subtext here. People are naked.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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