yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
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