Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
