so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
