2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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