The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Come share oat with me in your robe
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
