Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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