You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Randomize
