so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
