it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
