i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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