wakey wakey hands off snakey
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
