You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize