I must be too annoying 4 u.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
