If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Holy shit dude........stairs
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize