There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize
