Have you finally orgasmed yet?
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
