So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
