if you like me you must not know who I am
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
