dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
