Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Randomize
