She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Randomize
