Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
